Light

I got to spend Thanksgiving with my goddaughter, her husband and their 3-month old baby. At the end of the weekend, they were talking about how excited they were to go Christmas tree shopping. A huge part of their excitement was recognizing how mesmerized the baby was going to be by the tree and its lights.  While I think both of them are brilliant, this wasn’t exactly a brilliant observation. The kid is mesmerized by absolutely everything, truly the beginner’s mind.

This made me think about our own fascination with light. Every spiritual practice refers to light, to seeing the light, to becoming enlightened. As we approach the Winter Solstice, the darkest longest days, celebrations of light and the return of the sun abound in every culture. From the ancient Romans to Japanese, Chinese, and Middle Eastern cultures, fires are lit to ward off the darkness and to celebrate the return of the sun, the return of longer days, the return of light.

I like this quote from James Turell, “In a way, light unites the spiritual world and the ephemeral, physical world. People frequently talk about spiritual experiences using the vocabulary of light: Saul on the road to Damascus, near-death experiences, Samadhi or the light-filled void of Buddhist enlightenment.

Our physical yoga practice offers us the opportunity to recognize the return of the sun on a daily basis. We practice Surya Namaskar, literally saluting the sun. This is more than just a warm up, although it does bring heat and light into the body, it is a way for us to recognize that we are connected to and a part of the Universe and all its machinations.

Our asana practice can offer another way to connect to light as well. As a teacher, I see it all the time when a student learns something new or is able to do something they hadn’t been able to do before. Using their own body as a tool and their practice, I watch the light bulb turn on, they “see the light.” While this is a somewhat superficial interpretation, it is a step on the path to awareness, to illumination and is an example of how light unites the spiritual and physical worlds.

Years ago, I was stepping out of my apartment building on a rainy morning along with my neighbor. As we both opened our umbrellas he said, “Ah, the rain falls on the just and the unjust.” I loved it and took it to mean that, when it comes down to it, we are all in the same boat. The same is true for the light. It is the same light here as it is there. If we can tap into our own beginner’s mind, we can see that the light unites us all. We are all the same.

Attitude of Gratitude

If you had told me a year ago that I would be writing the Focus of the Month for the Yoga Shanti newsletter, my response would have been, “Get outta town!”  Yet, here I am, doing just that. No, I cannot quote yoga sutras and give you words of wisdom, but I will share some of the experiences and discoveries I’ve had since I’ve come to Yoga Shanti.

Back in April, I came on board as the new manager of the Sag Harbor studio. I had no prior experience running a yoga studio, but I’ve had plenty of other business experience over the years working in finance and running restaurant kitchens. I thought “How difficult could it be?”

Surprise!  In my first week alone, I was reduced to tears. I was bamboozled with trying to memorize a zillion student names, learning a new computer system, dealing with MindBody and customer accounts, finding last-minute substitute teachers, responding to a barrage of emails, dealing with emergency locksmiths, purchasing props, cleaning blankets, editing the newsletter, doing the bookkeeping and so on. A hundred times a day I asked myself, “What the heck did I get myself into?”  A former Yoga Shanti manager, upon hearing my plight, informed me, “Theresa, this is not a job. It’s a lifestyle!”  Boy, how right she was!

Amidst the maelstrom, I had one anchor in the sea of insanity at work each day and that was the chance to jump into yoga classes. It was delicious to have 60 or 90 minutes to “zone out” and not have to think at all. Tentatively, I started to take classes as if I was gingerly sticking my toe in to test the waters. Yoga wasn’t totally new to me but I hadn’t regularly practiced in almost 25 years. I used to frequent a little studio on Staten Island at the edge of New York Harbor where I could lay in savasana and hear the ferry fog horns and the clanging of the buoys. The passage of time, however, was none too kind to me, physically-speaking, with  the jelly rolls, the stiff and creaky bones and the loss of flexibility. Most of all, I had completely lost my ability to balance which, I believed, was merely a reflection of my mental state. My mind could not be stilled, it could not focus. It just raced from one thing to another and, try as I might, I couldn’t lasso it in.

While at the studio, I came to know the many students who religiously came to class each day, despite busy schedules, inclement weather, sickness, physical injuries and personal obligations. Some students even came twice a day. I watched the beginners’ club members, so dedicated and enthusiastic, and the 8:00 am crew who you could count on to show up like the rising of the sun. Don’t even get me started on all the wonderful teachers. I would try their different classes like I was sampling a smorgasbord. I gleaned a precious morsel from each one of them.

In retrospect, six months and 100 yoga classes later, I notice a gradual change, a shift. Physically, I feel like I’ve grown two inches taller. I find space in my body where there was none before, as well as increased strength and flexibility. Don’t get me wrong, I still have far to go. Tree pose is daunting and I fall out of it every time. I can’t do a chaturanga to save my life. But that’s ok. I just keep plugging at it. One day, it may come. If it doesn’t, that’s ok, too.

With that attitude, I note, more importantly, a shifting in my mind –  an acceptance of things as they are right here, right now. There is the beginning of a mindfulness, a new-found patience, an appreciation of every little thing –  even if it’s something as mundane as folding the studio blankets or, for that matter, something as basic as drawing breath. It’s amazes me how, for years, I’ve only breathed “from the neck up”, never taking the time to actually inhale deeply and exhale with satisfaction. At times, I confess, I’ve even caught myself with a peaceful and quiet mind –not racing around like it usually does. I can relish silence rather than be fearful of it. Has yoga taught me all that?  I don’t know…perhaps…or perhaps it’s just that yoga puts you in that mental state where you can be open to all things. It’s amazing how many times people have crossed my desk saying “Yoga has changed my life.”  Now, I can believe it! This is just the tip of the iceberg. Who knows the lifetime of lessons yoga can bring?

One of my favorite parts of class is when a teacher says, “Take time now to dedicate your practice.”  Wow!  What a beautiful thought!  To think that we can give something back for all the good we receive. Whether you believe in the power of prayer or of raising your mind and heart to a higher consciousness or of just sending good energy out into a world so desperately in need of it, I’m gladdened by the notion that, by dedicating your practice, you can bring somebody or something some good.

So, this Thanksgiving, at the risk of sounding sentimental, I will have an attitude of gratitude. I am very grateful for my beautiful daughter, Lucia; my family; my home; my job; my bosses; my chance to practice yoga – for all the blessings in my life. Also, I am grateful to you all – you students and teachers who continue to inspire and encourage me each and every day. This Thanksgiving, I dedicate my practice to you.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your families!

Namaste!

Theresa

Mindfulness

Do you ever find yourself feeling that there is too much going on in your life? You are caught up in trying to accomplish all you need to do, while still adding more to your “to do” list? It’s easy to slip into that mode, especially in the fall season, that time of the year when we reorganize, getting back into our routine after summer vacation.

Recently, I have been feeling overwhelmed with everything going on in my life. Transitioning from summer to begin a full year of studying functional medicine health coaching (which will eat up a significant chunk of my time), has me wondering, “OK… am I spreading myself too thin? Am I pushing myself too far?” I was overcome with panic, which I didn’t like at all. A friend reassured me, “You’ll see, a year goes super-fast”! But his words had me conjure up the image of a hamster running endlessly on a wheel.

You see, I was feeling overwhelmed because I was looking at the big picture, the goal, the end results and all I needed to do to reach my destination a year from now. My anxiety and tension were depriving me of the pleasure of being open and engaged in my new endeavor. More importantly, it prevented me from being present in the “now”.

I found a strong need to find balance between my work and self-care. I questioned how I could find that balance. The answer struck me: By practicing mindfulness and conscious presence in everything I do. But, is that even possible?

First, I decided to experiment with my yoga practice. I have been doing yoga for over 20 years and, the fact that it is constantly changing and transforming, should help me to be in the moment. So, I used my yoga practice to help me be fully engaged in the present. I concentrated not on the poses but on the transitioning, the journey from one pose to another. Soon, my anxiety and tension morphed into a sort of game of trying to be in the moment in whatever I did. Whether I was practicing or teaching yoga, studying, conversing with a friend, cooking a meal, listening to music, I played this game of challenging myself to be fully present. I began to feel relief and a real sense of accomplishment in whatever I did. That feeling of running like a hamster on a wheel vanished completely.

Discovering that my yoga practice is a precious ally is really comforting. Rediscovering its power to ground is like finding a refuge where I can be at ease and fully connected. This is what the practice of yoga gives us – a sense of embodiment of the present, allowing parts of ourselves to connect with breath and movements mindfully. The next time you practice, try paying more attention in between poses. What is most important? The destination, the end results of a pose or the journey and the exploration of it?

For me, it’s like traveling to a charted destination. Just focus on the journey, the landscape, the parts in between, every detail. Stop and smell the roses. Really be present in the action of traveling, enjoy the process, avoid those impatient “are we there yet” moments.

We all have our challenges and transition periods in life—some are more stressful than others. The way we experience those challenges and transitions are unique and precious to each of us. Learning how to be fully in the experience may combat the harmful stressors in life and be a key to open the way to a more balanced and healthy lifestyle.

As my very first Yoga teacher use to say: “Have Courage!” Training ourselves to be truly engaged in our unpleasant as well as pleasant experiences in life requires diligence and courage. I’d also like to add: Find pleasure in everything you do. Enjoy! Really be present in the journey. Don’t worry! You’ll reach your destination—we all do, one way or another!

Namaste!

Openness/Overcoming Fear

I recently encouraged a student to try an arm balance. She was hesitant. When I asked her why, she said, “I’m afraid to try it.” The posture—visvamitrasana—requires stability and openness, and is complex in the type of preparation that is required for even the most advanced practitioner. The student told me, “I am flexible but not very strong.” She had become so attached to these labels of herself that she was limiting her practice. Clinging had created a boundary of fear.

At Yoga Shanti, we are encouraged to practice and teach the concept of any amount, which means listening to one’s body without pushing or forcing ourselves into something. But there is an important distinction between the boundaries that we set out of mindfulness and the boundaries that we set out of clinging to our fears. Sometimes rules are meant to be broken. Sometimes we need to test the ideas that we have about ourselves in order to flex our fearlessness muscles. This is what it means to be truly open. As the brilliant Pema Chodron has written, “Openness doesn’t come from resisting our fears but from getting to know them well.”

The cool thing about working with students repeatedly is that eventually I will have observed their practices long enough to recognize their blind spots, allowing me to serve as a mirror. I am not telling them what I think their blind spots are but, rather, holding space for them to test theories, take risks or try something new. Often times, this means I need to physically assist them. A sense of humor also helps. Most importantly, the encouragement needs to come from a place of warmth and care. Through repeated practices together, there is the potential to build a relationship of trust, and that’s when the real magic happens in a yoga class.

The student eventually did attempt visvamitrasana, albeit a modified version. When I asked her how she felt afterward, she looked at me, smiled and replied, “I feel great!”

Yoga doesn’t always have to be serious. It can be playful. You can break rules. When we allow ourselves to face our fears on the mat, we are strengthening our courage in our everyday lives. The result could be more openness, confidence and compassion for those around us who push our buttons, because we are better able to recognize our own fears in their behavior. The secret is to keep showing up and, hopefully, get to know your teachers and fellow students.

Yoga Shanti Tribeca is officially open. Come play with us. Our space is small but our community is warm, and I feel blessed knowing I am surrounded by teachers who lead with incredible knowledge and grace.

In peace,
Alex

Puzzle Pieces

It’s been hard for me to write this focus. I’m not sure why. It’s been hard to find the focus. Most times when I sit down to write blogs, which I do often, I ask for inspiration. What am I meant to communicate today? What is the message that wants to come through me? Somehow this experience has been more challenging.

I feel that I’m up against something, a huge breakthrough, and in large part it’s come through writing. I’m working on a book about an adventure I took ten years ago when I met my spiritual mentor. I met him in California and, only months before I remember being in the Hamptons. I was part of a meditation group and there was an Ayurvedic healer who was visiting and he was giving readings, so I scheduled one. He told me that if ever there was reason for me to go to California, I should without hesitation. I did, not remembering his message until later when all the pieces started coming together.

Maybe the challenge of writing this focus is a puzzle that I haven’t yet solved, the pieces not yet coming together. In the days I’ve sat down to write, I’ve explored a great many ideas, some I’ve followed and scrapped. Others never made it to the page. I’ve thought about my relationship to the Hamptons and how I came here as a child visiting my grandparents and had such an idyllic view of the place. And then, how the Hamptons became this completely different place, when I later moved here in my twenties to live with my grandmother who was dying of cancer, and embarked on a journey that would lead me to start teaching yoga, taking the first-ever teacher training program at Yoga Shanti. I’ve thought how different the Hamptons feel this year. Maybe I feel that way every year. I’ve thought about listening and how I’ve been trained to follow the clues that are being presented. I’ve thought about pushing. About how, when the words aren’t coming to the page, all I can do is wait and be ready for when they do. Or keep writing even if I scrap what comes over and over and over again until it finally flows and fits together.

I had a surfing lesson scheduled today. It was honestly the only thing I was really looking forward to doing all weekend. I so desperately wanted to get on that board and be in the ocean—my happy place. I drove to the beach to meet my instructor and not only were there no parking spots, but there was a line that spilled out of the lot that they expected you’d have to wait in for at least a half hour to secure a spot. I pulled up into the queue, but it wasn’t feeling right, so I left. It wasn’t lining up and I couldn’t even communicate with my surf teacher because he has no reception on the beach. I made one more attempt to park at a beach nearby, but that didn’t work either. So, I surrendered.

I made it back home to the house where I’m staying, at my great uncle’s, on Big Fresh Pond in Southampton, where I practically learned to swim. The minute I pulled into his sandy driveway and saw the water through the trees, I knew I was exactly where I needed to be. I was frustrated that the one thing I had been looking forward to hadn’t worked out, but I trusted that this was the experience I was meant to have. It wasn’t time.

It felt like the process of writing. Waiting for the idea. Waiting for the story.

I thought back to being on the mat yesterday. How I’ve really been working on listening more and watching when I just want to get somewhere else. What’s the next thing? How can I do that seemingly impossible pose, right now? Instead of allowing for the process. Just like the process of writing this focus—imperfect and human.

I’m not sure that all the pieces have come together. This puzzle might be one that takes the rest of August, or farther still, but it’s a journey I’m committed to. My mentor calls it following the magical thread. It’s not the easiest path to walk, but it’s a lot more graceful than bulldozing my way to a result, or an outcome leaving a wake of unpleasant consequences behind me.

So here’s to allowing the puzzle pieces to come together no matter what we have to go through in the process.

Atha yoga anushasanam. (Now, yoga.)

I sit to write this in the midst of Summer Solstice: the longest, lightest day of the year, which also happens to be International Yoga Day. Summer feels like a season of abundance—lots of vacation, lots of yoga, lots of watermelon and guacamole and Aperol Spritzes. After a long, cool, East Coast Spring, the possibility and promise of summer is (for me, at least) highly anticipated.

And yet with the promise of abundant warmth and sunshine and beach time (with the promise of the abundance of anything, really), comes the nagging voice that says, “What if there is not enough?” The worry about whether there will be enough is often followed by something like, “What is everyone else doing and what if I miss out?” And in the age of epic social media saturation, there is plenty of evidence that everyone else is doing something fabulous and that you are, indeed, missing out.

That’s the thing about our brilliant brains—they can spin out before we even realize it. In an instant, we’ve left our bodies and the present moment and are lost in some cycle of comparing ourselves to others, while worrying that our past choices could have been wrong and that we may not be navigating ourselves toward an Instagram-perfect photo op. Thankfully for our busy, always evaluating and assessing and calculating minds, we have the practice of yoga.

When I catch myself in a fear-of-missing-out/inadequacy spiral, it’s helpful for me to remember two gems from Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra.  First is the first sutra: “Atha yoga anushasanam.” Translation: “Now, yoga.” So simple that it’s sometimes skipped over, this sutra reminds us that yoga and its practices and teachings are available here and now and at any time in the future, with or without the perfect pose or outfit or pedicure. And what a relief. Out of body moment? Jealousy? Sadness? Joy? Excitement? Perfect. Practice yoga. This may mean that you actually roll out your mat and practice asana. This may mean that you sit quietly in meditation for a moment or five and practice returning your attention to your body and breath in the present moment. This may mean practicing one of the central ethical tenants of the practice like non-harming (ahimsa), friendliness and compassion (maitri and karuna) or honesty (satya).

The other gem from the Yoga Sutra that I return to again and again is the concept of santosha, translated as contentment. The Yoga Sutra lists santosha as one of the five niyamas, which are observances that yogis are to practice within Paranjali’s system of yoga. For me, the practice of santosha is a practice of looking at the world around us and cultivating gratitude for what is in our worlds. It is not a practice of minimizing sorrow or of focusing only on successes and accumulation of material goods. Instead, santosha in action involves recognizing the entirety of our situations—the good, the bad and the in-between—and then making peace with and, perhaps, even cultivating gratitude for whatever is there.

So, as we roll in to summer, it is my prayer that we all take time to be embodied in the present moment. That we may be present enough to feel the sand or the grass or the pavement beneath our feet. That we allow for the possibility that we are enough and that we grow our ability to be content and at peace with who we are, where we are and what we are. And, finally, that we put down our phones and step onto our yoga mats every chance we get.

Hope

So, you feel like the bad weather is following you around and you just can’t get a ray of the sun. It’s time to check your horoscope and see a Shaman and get active in shaking the shadows or maybe it is time to hide and wait out the storm. Are these lessons for you to uncloak the diamond soul or just random events that keep turning up sour. Who knows? Who knows?

This is the time your asana practice is supposed to kick in and turn lemons into juice. It would work if you could only get out of the lethargy that the turn of events is manifesting. Sad, dejected, lifeless and beaten, you sit unable to lift a finger and even your cat smells the stink and won’t keep you company. Bad attracts bad and an endless cycle of rotten is at hand. There at the bottom, sinking now, in your own despair, you are left with a heartbeat and a breath. A rhythm and a miracle has not abandoned you yet. That beat and that breath is quite magnificent, especially at the bottom of this isolated infinity. Dare you be hopeful? To hope sometimes provides a light but it is often a cliff in which you fall again and again. So why not stay with the pulse and the wind, over and over. Do you feel your heart and your lungs? They are the call of the wild and, for a split second, they are able to give you a relief from your monkey mind. In a day, approximately 20,000 times, you breath in and out and have 90,000 beats of your heart. So many chances you are given to land your mind, your heart and your soul into the moment by moment arising phenomenon. Even a couple of times a day, this dropping into the inner exquisite workings of the body can bend the corners of your mouth skyward and save you from only seeing the doom and gloom.

Practice this tuning in and listening daily and, when the chips are down, it might just save your life.

Baggage

My husband and I recently returned from a six-month sabbatical. We quit our jobs, moved out of our apartment, then left our families and dogs behind. Off to travel the world, we were going places we’d never been and seeing things we’d never seen.

As always there was a catch: I had to fit everything I needed for six months in a carry-on bag.  Additionally, everything I had with me, including any hand luggage, had to be under 30 lbs., total. Anyone who has ever traveled with me knows that I am not a light packer. I am the one with the Band-Aids, the allergy medicine, the six pairs of shoes for a weekend trip “just in case”. As you can just imagine, traveling with a small bag for six months was EXTREMELY challenging.

To keep my carry-on light, I had to adopt a “one in / one out” policy. Almost every single day of the trip, I looked at something in my bag and asked myself, “Do I really NEED this?” And every time I got rid of something and my bag felt a little lighter, I realized that I felt a bit lighter, too. It was like a weight had been lifted off me.

We all know what this feels like. Cleaning out a closet, ending a toxic relationship, throwing away all the receipts in your purse—basically emptying excess baggage. There is a sense of lightness that comes from simple subtraction.

Spring is a really beautiful time to get rid of things, to do a cleanse (physical or spiritual) and relieve yourself of some baggage. Spring is a time is for new growth. New growth cannot happen if there are weeds, old roots or untilled soil. Right?

Yoga can be a powerful tool in helping you lighten the load. It’s never easy because you are going to have to get rid of some things you would rather hold on to. You are going to have to let go of old ideas about yourself.  You need to ditch some of that old stuff in your closet that is holding you back. You are going to have to shed things that are keeping your soil hard and impenetrable. It’s not easy but even a little shedding goes a long way.

Start Now

For the most part, I love my life. Sure, I go back and forth on what could have been or what might be. But incessant worrying about past decisions can lead to feelings of hopelessness and depression, and excess worry about the future can cause havoc. Psychologists have shown that indecision causes anxiety which can lead to depression.

Science tells us that if one’s basic needs—food, water, clothing, shelter, and companionship—are met, then contentment, as evidenced by brain activity, is present. Anything extra, they say, doesn’t increase happiness (that is, the brain activity doesn’t change much). The search for happiness/contentment is ancient.

For me, though, a morning sit of 10 minutes and a bit of asana have a profound effect on my day. Time spent in nature looking at beauty and listening to ambient sounds is also therapeutic. I also love to ask myself the questions “What am I passionate about? What do I like to do? Am I doing it?”  No rush, but a few adjustments may need to be made.

The bottom line is, if we practice something that prevents us from obsessing over the “what ifs,” then we’ll get better at it. We get good at what we practice. How many times do we need to hear this?! Roshi Joan Halifax says, “Now is the time. Appreciate your life.” Even if you didn’t one minute ago, now is the time. (She adds that being kind and helping others in some sweet way is part of a surefire way to be happy.)

Life is so short. We have FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) because we think something else may make us happy. But missing out on what is right in front of us is actually a shortcut to discontent. If we are loved and give love, if we work hard and have fun, then whatever it is that we have chosen is the perfect thing to be doing.

Here’s a recipe for contentment:

  1. Practice asana without judgement and force.
  2. Sit for a set time each day, and just listen and feel.
  3. Become familiar with the yamas and niyamas.
  4. Do good work.
  5. Help others.

This recipe yields space that has been log-jammed by physical or mental agitation, including agitation caused by worrying about the past or the future. It also reveals the answers to the questions “Am I happy?” “How did I get here?” and “What choice should I make?”

I try to live by the words of Nkosi Johnson, an activist from South Africa who was born HIV positive and died at age 12, “Do all you can with what you have, in the time you have, in the place you are.”

Forms of Freedom

A while ago, I went to the zendo where I regularly practice meditation and, donning my robes and grabbing a cushion, headed into the meditation hall to sit. Instead of being greeted by the familiar neat rows of cushions and fellow practitioners sitting quietly, everything and everyone was all over the place. Ignoring my puzzled expression, my teacher abruptly instructed me to “Just sit anywhere.” I found an open space and carefully arranged myself on my pillow, settling in. I wasn’t sure what was going on, but I was determined to focus and embrace silence and stillness.

As soon as I had found my first few breaths, my peace of mind was interrupted. Instead of the usual melodious bells that indicated it was time for the sangha to rise and join in kinhin—walking meditation—there was a solitary loud wooden “clack.” We all stumbled to our feet, blinking into the fluorescent lights that had not yet been dimmed to set the mood. Still hopeful that order might be restored, I placed my hands in gassho in front of my fragmented heart.

“Just walk anywhere,” my teacher said, and began traipsing around casually. The mindful ballet we perform with each other in perfect lines was at once transformed into a crazy jig. It was like trying to navigate a clear path through Grand Central Station at rush hour with the cacophony of voices in your head providing irritated accompaniment: “Get out of my way, stupid!”

When my teacher said, “OK, you can sit down,” I was not near my spot, and so I had to sit on someone else’s cushion, which was too high, too firm, and too near the fan! I wondered if somehow I was in an episode of Stranger Things, and had slipped into the Upside Down. Then my teacher’s gentle tone resumed: “OK, that’s enough of that. Let’s reset the temple!”

We talked, then, about forms and ritual and their roles and importance in cultivating concentration and transforming practice. Form creates a container inside of which you can let go of anything that is not relevant to practice. The practice itself is illuminated as distractions take a back seat. The distractions are still present—they are all still my teachers—but they potentially lose some definition as the bigger picture comes into view.

Today, when I came into the yoga studio to teach, my students were dutifully lined up in rows, yoga mats cheek by jowl, blankets and blocks neatly stacked alongside. Unceremoniously, I asked everyone to get up and go put their yoga mats somewhere else—maybe behind the column or on top of someone else’s mat or facing the “wrong” way. I said, “Put your props out of reach.”

You know where I’m going, but they didn’t. Some looked confused, some annoyed, some excited.

“OK, sirsanasana,” I said, “or maybe hanumanasana.” Some looked like they might cry. Before anyone could move, I said, “OK, let’s reset the temple!” Svaha!

Krama is a Sanskrit word that denotes a thoughtful sequence of events, or step-by-step process by which we approach each asana, gradually developing knowledge and intimacy with the poses. This approach ultimately leads us to encounter ourselves as whole and connected—we experience the interrelated and evolving nature of the asanas and recognize that we, too, are interrelated and evolving. Paradoxically, it’s our observance of order, of sequence, of ritual, of form, that serves to bring us face-to-face with the formless—with pure possibility. Desikachar describes this awareness as having “no form, no gender, no qualities, no features.” Perhaps this is what moksha, or real freedom, is.

Back on track in class, the students moved through a series of poses preparing for hanumanasana. Now that they did not have to worry about where their mat or props were, or if they could trust their teacher to guide them safely and soundly through the practice, they were able to concentrate and relax: sthirum sukham asanamum! Each one was now held in the secure arms of the structure and sequence, and consequently able to add their own divine flair. One student said afterwards that they better understood how all the parts of yoga related to each other. That it felt good to be organized, and that it helped them pay attention to their practice. I think it also made everyone more sensitive to each other.

As a teacher, I now notice more and more a kind of resistance among many students to what I shall call the way of yoga—the form. It’s all very loosey-goosey, downward-doggy, or whatever flight-of-fancy pose they like, regardless of the teacher’s careful directions. Blocks mostly get used as mini-altars for iPhones, or trays for coffee and green juice.

It used to be a point of pride to fold your blanket nicely at the end of class and store it neatly for the sangha sister or brother who might use it next. It used to be a thing to sit up when the teacher entered the room, and to do the little bow at the conclusion of the practice together. “Namaste,” we’d say, “the light within me honors the light in you.” I wonder, have the lights gone out?

I think not. Krishnamacharya, the father of vinyasa yoga, literally met his students at the gate, and after guiding them through practice, accompanied them back to the gate. It was more than a formality. Like Krishnamacharya, I want to travel with my students barefoot along the path of liberation. I want to be a braver and more compassionate teacher. It is not enough to simply link the poses together. It is also my responsibility to demonstrate the connection between folding my blankets, and offering a blanket to someone who needs it. The way of yoga extends beyond the boundary of the yoga studio’s doors.

On the train home, I witnessed an old man with a cane stand and give his seat to a young girl with a heavy package. He insisted. She smiled and sat down. The ceremony of offering and accepting a seat had a certain formality to it, but seeing this made me feel as free as a bird.